...where distraction is the main attraction.

Wednesday, December 14, 2011

Single Malt Report: Springbank 10 years old 100 proof (part 3 of 4)

The Springbank Taste Off continues!


From left to right we've got Hazelburn 8yr, Springbank 10yr 100 Proof, and Longrow CV.




On Monday, I gave a little intro into the Campbeltown region and the Springbank Distillery.
On Tuesday, I reported on Hazelburn 8yr.
Today, I'll report on Springbank 10yr 100 proof

The historical recap:  Though just a tiny town, Campbeltown was a serious whisky producer in the 1800s.  A major downturn in the 1900s decimated over 90% of their distilleries.  The strongest remaining producer of in the region is the Springbank distillery which makes a number of completely unique whisky brands, all separated by different distillation methods.

Springbank's Springbank brand is their largest and most popular.  One of their bottlings can be found at any decent liquor store in California, unlike the more limited Hazelburn brand.  Springbank's malt is distilled two-and-a-half times, is lightly peated, and remains unchillfiltered and undyed, keeping the resulting whisky in the style of the old Campbeltown bottlings.  Their regular 10 year is bottled at 46% ABV.  But this is not their regular 10 year.



PROOF*:  As you'll see by the subject heading, the particular whisky that I'm tasting is labelled "100 Proof".  Alcohol Proof in the UK is different than in the US.

In the US, when alcohol content was first tested in a lab, it was done so per 200 parts of the liquid.  If 80 parts of the liquid was alcohol, the liquid was thus 40% alcohol.  So US "proof" equals twice the Alcohol by volume.  Thus 100 proof = 50% ABV.

In the UK, it's much sexier.  Back when British sailors were allowed to bring aboard rations of rum, they would test to see if it had been diluted.  To do this, they would submerge gunpowder in a portion of the rum.  Then they'd light it on fire.  If the rum had been watered down, then the gunpowder wouldn't ignite.  If it remained flammable, then it was good to go.  Because they didn't have sophisticated scales, they set the undiluted standard (proof of quality, if you will) at 100 proof.  Later studies discovered that the amount of alcohol necessary for this flammable balance was 4:7 or 57.14%.  Thus 100 proof = approximately 57%.

Because Springbank is from the UK and because they wanted to label the whisky in the classic (pre-1980) fashion, they appended the name with "100 proof".  And it is thus 57% alcohol by volume.  It's a strong drink.

(Update: It turns out that the US bottling is in fact 50% ABV, thus 100 US proof.  The UK bottling is 57% ABV, which is 100 UK proof.  Not sure why they chose to change it for the American market.  To prevent confusion, perhaps?  The "105" in Glenfarclas 105 refers to its UK proof, which equals 60% ABV, yet the distillers bottled it at that same strength for the US and the UK.  BUT, no worries, the US bottling of the Springbank 10yr 100 proof is also delicious and will get its own report in the near future.)

* - Though copious interent research went into this "Proof" information, it was still just internet research.  I welcome all corrections.


DistillerySpringbank
Brand: Springbank
Age: minimum 10 years
Maturation: Mostly bourbon
Region: Campbeltown
Alcohol by Volume: 57% (100 UK Proof)


Like the other two drams, I obtained my taste of Springbank 10yr 100 proof from Master of Malt's Drinks by the Dram samples.  The little bottle held 3cL (30mL) worth, perfect for a taste off.

Here's how I structured the Taste Off:
Hazelburn (neat), Springbank (neat), Longrow (neat), then...
Hazelburn (w/water), Springbank (w/water), Longrow (w/water)

So now, in the second slot, Springbank 10 years old 100 Proof.  First, neat:

The color was a light gold, but a bit darker than the Hazelburn.  The nose on cask strength whiskies can be tricky, full of alcohol burn.  But not this one.  Much less of a burn than I had anticipated.  Instead it was very oceanic, salt and seaweed.  Then plastics, dyes on old baseball cards, a little toffee at the end.  My notes say, "a seaside carnival".  The palate immediately felt like a mild Islay.  A little bit of Bowmore-style peat.  A nibble of Johnnie Walker Black.  Then more wet peat.  Apricots.  Sweet on the tongue but not sugary.  The finish was red hot and very lengthy!  Full of band-aids and ocean mist.

Then I added two tablespoons of water, bringing the ABV down to 35%.

The nose was now "almost Lagavulin".  Nice peat, with cinnamon, pastries, band-aids, and a little citrus.  The palate was reminiscent of my great Bowmore 16yr from Signatory.  Also reminded me of a lightly-fruited Lowland wrapped up in peat.  The finish was "cinnamon on a peat pillow".

Adding the water turned it into completely different experience.  That's what I love about these high strength whiskies.  They allow you to choose your own adventure.  This one turned an industrial oceanic ass-kicker into a compulsively drinkable anytime malt.  I liked them both considerably.

A note about the bottling:  The good news is that this whisky is stellar.  The bad news is that it's no longer in production.  At some point this year Springbank replaced it with the 12yr Cask Strength.  That new heavy hitter is getting good notices, though some reviewers miss the big baby from this report.  The large online UK whisky sellers no longer carry the 10yr 100 proof.  But if you do some good detective work, you just might find a US seller with a bottle left.  I did.

Pricing - Excellent at $70
Rating - 92

Tomorrow: Longrow CV!

Tuesday, December 13, 2011

Single Malt Report: Hazelburn 8 years old (part 2 of 4)

It's a Springbank Taste Off!


From left to right we've got Hazelburn 8yr, Springbank 10yr 100 Proof, and Longrow CV.




To review: though just a tiny town, Campbeltown was a serious whisky producer in the 1800s.  A major downturn in the 1900s decimated over 90% of their distilleries.  The strongest remaining producer of in the region is the Springbank distillery which makes a number of completely unique whisky brands, all separated by different distillation methods.

One of these whisky brands is Hazelburn.  Named after one of the closed old distilleries, Hazelburn's distillation began in 1997, with the first bottling (8 years old) released in 2005.  They've since added three other bottlings, but the 8 year old has been the most successful and the easiest one to find in The States.

The Hazelburn whisky sets itself apart from the other Springbank brands by its distillation methods.  Almost all scotch whisky is distilled twice.  Only Irish whiskies and scotch malts from The Lowlands are malted three times.  This third distillation creates a lighter smoother whisky.  Hazelburn now also passes through this third distilling, and its malt is not peated, thus allowing it to be crafted in the Lowland style.

Like all other Springbank produced whiskies, it isn't chillfiltered, it isn't artificially colored, and its barley is actually grown by Campbeltown farmers.  Here's a little more info:

Distillery: Springbank
BrandHazelburn
Age: minimum 8 years
Maturation: 60% ex-bourbon casks + 40% sherry casks
Region: Campbeltown
Alcohol by Volume: 46%
Limited bottling: 5,100

I came by my dram of Hazelburn 8 year via Master of Malt's tremendous Drinks by the Dram samples.  It's not available right now amongst their sample selection so I'm plenty happy that I was able to get it while it was there.  It was a 3cL or 30mL-sized dram which works very well for this sort of tasting.

Here's how I structured the Taste Off:
Hazelburn (neat), Springbank (neat), Longrow (neat), then...
Hazelburn (w/water), Springbank (w/water), Longrow (w/water)

This allowed me to compare and contrast these three very different whiskies.

So.... Hazelburn neat.

As you can tell by the bottle picture its color's very light, the lightest of the three whiskies.  Almost Sauvignon Blanc light.  Its nose was light, soft, full of confectioners' sugar, vanilla, cookie dough, and lemon.  It was like the scent of a bakery in full swing.  The texture mirrored the color, very light and soft.  But the palate shifted gears away from the nose.  It tasted of the sea, shellfish, and bread crusts.  My notes read: "Like a light lunch in the sun by the bay."  The finish was brief but very pleasant, soaked with the vanilla flavors from the bourbon casks.

Then I added one tablespoon of water, bringing the ABV down to 35%.

This caused everything to shift and change.  On the nose, the bourbon influence took a back seat to the sherry casks.  There was lots of anise to go with the sherry.  It was less sugary and contained some mysterious similarity to the Springbank 10yr I was sampling.  The palate was cream and cardboard, like the white cardboard bottoms on Hostess Cupcakes.  The finish was "kind and lazy", full of unsweetened breakfast cereal flakes.

Like Glenkinchie (a Lowland single malt) it's a light, polite dram.  But its nosing and flavors are a bit different than the Lowlands I've tried.  Less fruit, more malt and a curious seaside element that carries through the other Springbank brands that I tried.

A note about the bottle pricing: As you'll see, this is a relatively expensive 8yr official bottling.  The specific whisky production method likely factors into this price point.  You're paying for an old-school handmade process that uses Campbeltown-only resources.  Also, this is a limited bottling and its in short supply here in the US.  At the same time, I'm a little surprised by the expense compared to its Springbank brethren.  And it is priced out of the reach of most middle-class whisky lovers.  (UK amounts listed include shipping, but not VAT, and cover a 700mL bottle.)

Pricing - A little steep at $80-85 (U.S. & U.K.) if you find it for less, grab it before the price goes up
Rating - 82

Tomorrow: Springbank 10yr 100 Proof!

Sunday, December 11, 2011

Single Malt Report: Springbank Distillery (part 1 of 4!)

A bit of an intro first.  As I'd referenced in some early Single Malt Reports, Scotland's whisky production is often divided up into six regions:

The Lowlands (ex: Glenkinchie & Auchentoshan)
The Highlands (ex: Oban & Glenmorangie)
The Islands (ex: Jura & Talisker)
Speyside (ex: Macallan & Glenfiddich)
Islay (ex: Bowmore & Laphroaig)
Campbeltown...

Let's zero in on Campbeltown.  Here's a pic of the famous phallus, the Kintyre peninsula:


The town of Campbeltown is nestled down southeast, right near the, um, head.

Packing thirty-four distilleries into its tiny town on a little Scottish peninsula, Campbeltown proclaimed that it was "the capital of the whisky world".  With the coastal air, bounties of water and peat, tonnes of barley, and an excellent shipping location it was the perfect region for whisky production in the 1800s.

But the 1900s weren't so kind.

Thirty-four distilleries packed into a small town wasn't sustainable.  First there was overproduction.  Then the railroads made Speyside more easily accessible.  Then The Depression hit.  But the nail in the coffin was the American Prohibition.  By the 1950s, only two distilleries remained.  And those two are still up and running today:  Springbank and Glen Scotia.

The larger of the two, Springbank, is quite impressive.  Still independently owned, they are one of the only distilleries to use their own barley in their maltings.  They've reinvested their profits by buying up and incorporating some of the silent stills from the defunct distilleries.  They've had the funding and resources to help out Glen Scotia with its own production.  They don't chillfilter and they don't add colouring.  And they produce four entirely different whiskies with completely different production methods, each with their own set of bottlings:  Springbank, Longrow, Hazelburn, and Kilkerran.

Kilkerran is still a baby, but they have released a malt that I will beg, borrow, and steal for before 2012 has finished.  But I have had a whisky from each of the other three.  In fact, I had all three during a single tasting:


And it was marvelous.  One of my favourite whisky afternoons, ever.  There's so much goodness here that I'm going to split these single malt reports up over the next three days.

[Tuesday] Lowland style - Hazelburn 8 year old
[Wednesday] Campbeltown style - Springbank 10 year old 100 proof (actually 57.15% ABV!)
[Thursday] Islay style - Longrow CV (a mix of malts from 6-14 years)

Trailer Sunday: The Pirates! Band of Misfits

The last thing that the cinema needs right now is another pirate movie.  Another vampire movie wouldn't be bad as long as it references actual vampires, gives it an appropriate R-rated treatment, and treats the audience like grownups.  But pirates?  That shallow well was drained with the first Jack Sparrow film...

Oh look!  A new Aardman movie!  Yay!  Is it a Wallace and Gromit film?  No.  Is it a bunch of cheeky British animals going on an adventure of discovery?  No.  Is it a... Yes, it's a pirate film.

The good news is that first trailer is great.  It has a strange irreverent sense of humor, verbally and visually.  I actually wanted to see the film.  They sold me on a pirate film.



Then I saw the second trailer.  It takes everything that was fun about the first trailer and turns it into overbaked, unoriginal, heavy-handed crap.  "Dude" and gang signs and beep-beep and and "she's not fat, she's big boned" and monkeys and "Come on Feel the Noise".  I find it difficult to understand how anyone at Aardman thought that this was a good idea:



I mean, they sold it with the first trailer, then unsold it with the second.  Though it's difficult to be angry about the second trailer since it's more truthful, airing out the lame jokes.

Aardman has no interest in appealing to my demographic of one.  But they've built their brand on providing unique and original entertainment, and I don't see those qualities here.

To this I say bah humbug.

Friday, December 9, 2011

Thursday was L.A. Sports Day

Albert Pujols is taking his talents to Long Beach (adjacent).  As a Yankees fan, this provides no heartburn since the Yanks couldn't even beat the Angels before this.  As a baseball fan, I really dig this because now I can actually watch the sport's most exciting robot play every day!  If you don't think that he's a robot, I have a bridge I'd like to sell you.  He broke his forearm last year and was back in the lineup two weeks later as noticeably a better player.  I'm just going to repeat that.  He broke his forearm.  He healed in less than two weeks.  Then he was an even better player.  That's what the media will tell you at least.  He didn't heal at all.  They just replaced The Albot v4.1 with The Albot v4.2.  I'm interested in how the v5.0 model will perform.

DEAR GOD, HE'S MONSTROUS!
The contract is daft.  Not the $254M.  Compared to other salaries out there and his actual value, the yearly salary is reasonable.  What's cracked is that it was for 10 years.  My qualms have nothing to do with the unsubstantiated rumors that he's been lying about his age.  Future Pujols models will be unable to play the field, so he'll be restricted to DH within six years; maybe fewer if he can do what Jeter can't and surrender the glove before the fielding gets embarrassing.  So, for most of the contract they'll have a part-time player (which is what a DH is, value-wise).  Hasn't baseball seen this happen before.  You know, recently.  This year.  Alex Rodriguez, anyone?

The Angels also picked up CJ Wilson for five years, $77.5M.  Wilson has been a starter for two years and is already 31.  I'm just happy the Yankees didn't pick him up.  The Angels will have great starting staff with Weaver and Haren and Wilson.

But they'll also have a 2012 payroll of over $180 million.  That means that we'll see at least three teams (Sawx, Anaheim, and Phils) in the $160-$180M range next year.  Meanwhile, the Yankees' payroll in 2012 will be what it was SEVEN YEARS AGO.  So I guess there will be four evil empires now.



Tangent: Owner Jeffrey Loria busted out the once-a-decade Marlins Credit Card, signing Jose Reyes and Mark Bueller Buehrle to cushy multi-year deals.  This time he's gambling on a new stadium and swapping out the dreaded "Florida" for the less-dreaded "Miami" to bring in more fans.  Reyes is a great signing, as long as he's healthy.  We'll see if he brings in the local Dominican demographic that Loria desperately wants in his seats.  Buehrle, on the other hand, probably won't sell more tickets but should hang a couple more Ws up in the standings.  Still, these two guys aren't enough to take the NL East.  Even if Josh Johnson is healthy all year, they'll be lucky to tussle with Atlanta for the Wild Card.  And if DC's youth turn out to be half as good as the hype, the Marlins may not move anywhere in the standings.



Tangent:  When I lumbered into the condo building's elevator this morning at 6:45am on the way to the gym, I was engulfed in the scents of freshly baked chocolate chip cookies AND brownies.  Then the doors closed and the elevator descended.  It was a pleasing experience.  As far as erotic sensory experiences go, it was a ★★★½.



Tangent: iTunes awarded Tiny Tower as the best game app of 2011.  I have Tiny Tower.  It requires no skill and has not a hint of complexity.  And I don't mean that in a Zen way.  I mean that in a "barely holds your attention while you sit on the toilet" way.  I should know.




The Lakers gave up Pau Gasol and Lamar Odom for CHRIS PAUL.  He gets all caps because he is awesome.  And there are rumors floating, like oh so many methane-loaded turds, about an LA-Orlando trade based around Andrew Bynum and Dwight Howard.  If that goes through, the Lakers will run the table...... for the regular season.  And the playoffs.

They don't even need Howard.  Even with Bonehead Bynum playing occasionally, the CP-Kobe duo is monstrous.  It's perfect if you think about it.  Kobe wants the ball on every single play and CP is the best passer in the game.  As you can tell, my knowledge of on-court strategy is vast.  Vast.

"Esta bien."
This a reverse-Sheffield situation for me.  In 2004, I was a Yankee fan, but could not stand Gary Sheffield.  And then they signed him.  There was a lot nose pinching when he came to the plate in pinstripes.

[Wow, now I'm remembering that Yankee team.  By 2005 they'd picked up Sheffield, Randy Johnson, and Kevin Brown.  F***.  I guess I was just rooting for the uniform.]

Conversely, I'm not a Lakers fan (Go Clips!).  But I am a Chris Paul fan.  I wish the Clippers had traded for him, but they have no good pieces to deal--

BREAKING NEWS! (okay, it was breaking news when I started writing this last night)  The majority of NBA owners have blocked the trade.  Wow, what has happened to David Stern?  He's more like Daniel Stern now.

Here's the scoop: The Hornets are owned by the NBA, which means that each team owner has an equal share in the ownership.  This was supposed to allow the Hornets' general manager to deal openly with other teams, like any other GM.  But because this hurt some billionaires' feelings, as there was worry about the Lakers carrying an all-star team, they shotblocked this deal.  Stern clearly has no control over the owners and he handled the lockout like a fool.

And now a classic snippet from this morning's media blitz:
"I don't want to speak on the basketball side, but that particular one was weighed against Chris Paul's continued presence in New Orleans," Stern said in New York at the NBA's offices.  
NBA spokesman Tim Frank said Thursday the deal was blocked for "basketball reasons." The league owns the Hornets and is trying to sell the club.

So, um.  What?  Yes, let's not speak about the basketball side since you're the commissioner of Whack-A-Mole.  But then your spokesperson said that the deal was blocked due to the basketball side.

Well done.  Keep up the good work.  And to conclude, "Morons. I've got morons on my team."

Thursday, December 8, 2011

Trailer Thursday: John Carter

I'm still not sure what to make of John Carter.  It has Tatooine-like visuals and Na'vi tribal stuff without the pterodactyl rape and unobtanium.  There's a Lawrence of Arabia feel to it, filtered through Edgar Rice Burroughs.

With Andrew Stanton (WALL-E, Toy Story 1 & 2) directing/co-writing this, there's a lot of us genuinely hoping that the great filmmaking qualities from Pixar can transition to live action.  And that hope's not unfounded.  To me, Pixar's magic comes from their incredible writing teams and it's debatable how much actual live action is in John Carter.

Plus I think we can all use a big slab of entertainment that has been neither dumbed down nor compromised.

Here are the two trailers, which have completely different tones and at times seem to be pitching two different movies.  I think the second one spins the story with more clarity.

Teaser - 7/14/11


Trailer - 11/29/11


The studios have been trying to make this since the 1930's.  Ray Harryhausen (allegedly) wanted to make it back in the '50s.  Disney pulled together a great filmmaking team to do it in the '80s, but ultimately decided that the necessary visual effects didn't exist, yet.  Apparently they do now.

So here's to hoping that this is good.  With Stanton and Marc Andrews from Pixar responsible for the first script drafts and the Amazing Michael Chabon knocking out the final polishes, I think my optimism is warranted.

But, like every other blogger's post about this film, it's all speculation until March 9th.

Wednesday, December 7, 2011

Alligator, Exploding Fire Hydrants, Falling Moustaches, and Fire

Friday
(a solid start)
We have a few fix-it things going here at the condo, simultaneously.  Of course.  We received the last of our bids on our replacement windows.  Our current windows are mostly just symbolic, as opposed to functional.  Then, a gruff tatted-up war veteran fixed/replaced our balcony's sliding screen doors in a matter of minutes.  Finally, our chimney-sweeps(!) never showed up.  It's hard to get pissed off at a chimney-sweep.  I just couldn't wait to see his soot-covered face and hear his delightful cockney accent!

We also had a nice Shabbat here.  Candles, wine, challah.  The Albertsons across the street makes GREAT challah.  Like most Jews, I've had terrible challah for most of my life.  And now the scruffy Albertsons across the way makes good stuff.  Also, for those concerned about my health and finances, you mus'nt worry; their liquor selection is the worst I've ever seen.  So, I'll just be forced to walk a total of two blocks to get to three separate liquor stores.


Saturday
(speaking of liquor...)
I went on a whisky cruise, documented in this recent post.  It was grand, luxuriating on a boat, appreciating five different Bowmores.  Of course, that was in the afternoon.

There was an '80s party in the evening, for which I had to remain steadfastly conscious enough to be the designated driver.  After hours of whisky, it's difficult to stay upright, on one's feet until 1am.  Constant hydration was involved.  As was this:


Fake moustache fail!  But the chest hair never fails.  Here's another picture before the 'stache fell off:


May I add, that's not boogers on the 'stache.  That the reflection of the light off the shiny dead muskrat on my face.  There was a gleam on that thing.  I was one gold Star of David necklace away from being a record producer.

Here's Kristen working the theme much better.


Oh, the '80s.  Will they never ever ever leave?


Sunday
(a quiet day)
We spent time watching football with our friends, The Forresters, in beautiful Palos Verdes.  We were twice warned of the wild peacocks wandering the roads.  No wild peacocks this time, which was a good thing because my car would have flattened them as we marveled at all of the mansions.

At home I cooked up a solid chili, since the temperature dropped into the 30s.  Yes, this happens in Southern California sometimes...


Monday
(you know, like any other Monday)
The chimney-sweeps did show up, a half hour early, when I was inappropriately attired and shaving.  And they weren't Cockney.  They were Gustavo and Caesar.  And now we have a working fireplace.

At Trader Joes, I witnessed a middle-aged woman LOSING HER SH*T to the customer service staff that the bittersweet chocolate was bitter and not sweet.  No, she didn't want milk chocolate.  She wanted sweet bittersweet chocolate, goddamn it you terrible people.  And she demanded to try all of their other chocolate to find the right kind.  Customer service said no.  The woman was disappointed in them as human beings.

Then as I shopped for toothbrushes, I received a call from someone (who will go unnamed) who was ecstatic about an Electronic Toothbrush that he/she was buying me for Hanukkah!  It was difficult to know how to respond to that.  Especially when one gets to the cashier with over $100 worth of food and no wallet.  That was an hour lost.  Only one way to make up for that.


FIRE.  I'm a pyro, and the way things were shaping up, Kristen nominated herself to ignite the flame.  Good call.  Then football.


I poured some whisky to celebrate the anniversary of Prohibition's repeal and started up some turkey burgers.  All was well and calm.

Then outside the window, the sound of brakes squealing.  Then that unmistakable sound of WHUMP...WHUMP.

I ran to the window with that weird dread/excitement of seeing a multi-car wreck.  But there was only two cars in this crash because one of them BLASTED A FIRE HYDRANT SEVERAL YARDS OFF OF ITS CONCRETE BASE.  Which sent a FIVE-STORY EXPLOSIVE WATER PLUME firing into the air, sending pressurized kiloliters of water bursting into the sky.

For almost 30 minutes.  Blocks of streets were flooded within seconds.  At least two intersections were turned into moats.  The fire department could access the off switch because the crushed car was covering it.  They couldn't tow the car because, well:


Getting to the car on foot was one problem.  Getting a tow truck across the deep river and pulling the crushed car from its entrenchment was another.  It was actually kind of horrific to watch the waste of so much water, but it was impossible to stop watching the violence of the burst which was actually audible as the plume escaped the ground.

Ultimately no one was hurt.  But if either of these drivers were texting while driving, I will hurt them myself.


Tuesday
(the usual)
Upon exiting Hot's Kitchen in Hermosa Beach, where we'd gone for a friend's birthday dinner, Kristen and I saw Russell Brand hanging around outside the next doorway.  We had a simultaneous, "Whoa, that was Russell Brand."

At the next intersection we heard some self-appointed street toughs saying, "F*** Russell Brand. He can suck my d***."  And I wondered, how does that come up in conversation?

That almost made me forget for a moment that I'd just finished eating alligator tacos.  No, that's not some cute name for green tacos.  It was a quarter pound of alligator meat.  With cilantro, onion, and capers.  I give it ★★★.


May all of our Wednesdays be uneventful...