...where distraction is the main attraction.

Saturday, January 7, 2012

PLAYOFFS?! Yeah, I'm talkin' about playoffs.

Pic from blackandgold.com, Saints fansite (sorry)

Time for my barely informed NFL playoff pics.  I won't predict scores because that's the first sign of clinical psychosis.

First Round:
Giants over Falcons - The line on this one is Giants (-3). With Manning & Co at home, they can cover that.  But Eli will wait until the 4th Quarter to wake up.
Saints over Lions - Sproles will have 200 all-purpose yards by the end of the first kickoff.
Broncos over Steelers - TEBOW!  All he does is win.  But this time, it's because Big Ben breaks his ankle clean off in the first quarter.  Mr. Win will run for more yards than he'll throw.  I hate myself for this pick.
Texans over Bengals - This one's cheap because the game's already in the 4th quarter.

Second Round:
Packers over Giants - The only thing that would hurt the Packers is too much time off, but I've never bought that about professional teams.  Seriously, Rodgers is not hanging out at State Farm offices in the two week down time.
Saints over 49ers - The best game in this round.  The 'Niners still won't let up a rushing TD, but N.O. will win when the Saints pull an option play and Sproles throws a 98 yard pass......to himself.
Patriots over Broncos - May be the only time I will root for the Pats.  :(
Ravens over Texans - During his pre-game nonsense scream-a-thon, Ray Lewis's head explodes.  He still destroys Arian Foster in every single quarter.

Conference Champs:
Saints over Packers - Best game of the year.  The ground game and defense will give Saints the edge.  I will be rooting for both teams.
Patriots over Ravens - I will be rooting for neither team.

The NFL Bowl:
Saints over Patriots - I don't even think this will be close thanks to the Pats' pass defense issues.  But the commercials will be the big losers of the night when Gandhi hits Abe Lincoln in the crotch with a sledgehammer in the first Miller Douche ad.

Thems my picks.  Now, everyone rush off to Vegas to put your money on the 'Niners.