Auchentoshan 1983-2004 Scott's Selection

More often than not, I find officially bottled Auchentoshans to be sleepy, while independently bottled Auchentoshans burst fully awake and loony. Even when they spiral out all wrong, they're at least interesting. That's why I couldn't resist splitting this whisky bottle with my trio of whisky-bottle-splitting-people.

I reviewed the Glenlivet 1977 on Monday and the Bunnahabhain 1988 on Wednesday. The Glenlivet had a great sniffer, but the Bunny appealed to me more. Let's see where today's Lowlander lands.

Distillery: Auchentoshan
Distilled by: Eadie Cairns Ltd. or Morrison Bowmore
Current Ownership: Beam Suntory
Region: Lowlands (Glasgow-ish)
Bottler: Scott's Selection (R.I.P. 😿)





Age: 21 years or so (1983-2004)
Maturation: "in Oakwood casks" (great)
Alcohol by Volume: 52.4%
Chillfiltered? No
Caramel Colorant? No

Remember what I said about loony?

NEAT
The color? Five beer piss. Oh yeah. The nose is all the cereals: oats, barley, spelt, farro, emmer and effer. Lemongrass, chives and pickle brine. These awesome Japanese ginger cookies I can't stop eating. The palate is really herbal and grassy. So many lemons. Spearmint gum. Malty and briskly bitter. More grass and lemons in the finish. Minty, bitter and malty.

Hmm.

How about I lower it to the usual OB strength?

WITH WATER (~43%abv)
The nose is the olfactory equivalent of the pretend salads my daughter makes for me. Oregano, bay leaf, cocoa, white rice, toffee, barley, lime yogurt and sidewalk chalk. The palate is still grassy and herbal. Slightly floral, with a softer bitterness. Barley and a mild sweetness. Kind of ashy. It finishes super herbal. Ashy, bitter, and malty, with hints of mint and malt.

WORDS WORDS WORDS
I can't even.

This stuff is a riot of sensations and not a single one belongs together.

Some people would HATE this whisky. I am not some of those people. In fact, I'm sorta sad to see this one go. Count my boat rocked.

Availability - It's around
Pricing - $100-$200
Rating - 86 (maybe)

Bunnahabhain 1988-2004 Scott's Selection

On Monday, I reviewed a Glenlivet 1977, the oldest of three bargain bin Scott's Selection single malts split by your favorite local #whiskydicks. Today I'm reviewing the Bunnahabhain 1988 which is, like Master Gee, the baby of the bunch.

While the Glenlivet was held by some very refill "Oakwood", the Bunny had a least one active cask in the mix. Aside from having some color to it, there was all sorts of curious stuff going in the palate during my first approach. First I thought it was a sherry cask, but then Scott's usually labels those malts with a "Sherry Wood" designation. Then I thought it was there was a spritely American oak cask involved. Now, I sorta kinda think there may be a refill sherry cask and a first fill ex-bourbon. I blah blah blah all this because Scott's Selection hasn't labelled these whiskies as "single casks".

Distillery: Bunnahabhain
Distilled by: Highland Distilleries Company Ltd.
Current Ownership: Distell Group Ltd. (via Burn Stewart Distillers)
Region: Islay, but not the Sexy South
Bottler: Scott's Selection (R.I.P. 😿)





Age: 16-ish years (1988-2004)
Maturation: "in Oakwood casks" (plural!)
Alcohol by Volume: 53.8%
Chillfiltered? No
Caramel Colorant? No

NEAT
Its color is light gold, which really is one of the darkest shades I've seen in my Scott's bottles. The nose holds milk chocolate, caramel and lemon cake. Occasional hints of lychee and shoe leather. With time and air, it turns into maple syrup and Skittles. Seriously. The palate starts off salty and sweet, with a ginger zing and something phenolic. Tart citrus, tart berries and almond cookies. It grows sweeter and the fruit gets......fruitier. A touch of vanilla beneath. It has a long tingly finish with tart citrus and off-season cherries. More sugar and citrus with time.

WITH WATER (~46%abv)
In the nose, an earthy note joins the milk chocolate and bright fruits. The palate gets sweeter. Some tart lemons and limes. There's that edgy phenolic thing again. Tartness, sweetness, bitterness and vanillaness in the finish.

WORDS WORDS WORDS
At first the palate is a little closed, but then it blossoms with lots of air, turning into whisky candy. Its nose always works, with or without air, with or without water. Seems to swim well overall, though.

The "phenolic thing" stumps me more than the mystery cask(s). From my limited experience, Bunnahabhain of this period usually isn't this peatish. Could that be a cask artifact too? Or maybe just some whack funk in the juice.  👈 That sentence.

Monsieur MAO and I have some scarily similar notes on this same bottle of whisky. He picked up on that peaty thingamajig too. Florin (a prince) wasn't as excited about it, finding the oak a bit loud.

If you're in Illinois, Binny's may have a bottle or two left at the correct price of $79.99. Or they might not. It has that weird noncommittal status on the website. Otherwise it's selling for $150, $230, $250 and $400 elsewhere. What a country.

Availability - It's around
Pricing - see the final paragraph
Rating - 87 (with water, without water, whatever)

Glenlivet 1977-2004 Scott's Selection

Almost a year ago, Binny's Beverage Depot dropped the prices on all their remaining Scott's Selection whiskies. So four of us whisky gents split three of those bottles. Not too long after that, Binny's stopped shipping to Ohio. That's a bummer, but it has kept my whisky purchases limited, which is not a bummer.

It took a while before I tapped into my portions, but once I did they didn't last long. Luckily I saved 2oz of each for reviews......which are happening this week, starting with the oldest of the trio. A Glenlivet distilled in 1977.

Distillery: Glenlivet
Distilled by: The Glenlivet Distillers Ltd.
Current Ownership: Pernod Ricard
Bottler: Scott's Selection (R.I.P. 😿)





Age: 27-ish years (1977-2004)
Maturation: "in Oakwood casks" (rad!)
Region: Speyside (Banffshire)
Alcohol by Volume: 53.1%
Chillfiltered? No
Caramel Colorant? No

NEAT
Its color is light amber, which bodes well. The nose starts off big on peach and mango. Then lemon zest and cantaloupe. Some shortbread and confectioner's sugar. Its palate is completely different than the nose: sharp, tart and tight. Barley, lemons, limes, almonds and a hint of vanilla fudge. It finishes warm and simple. Vanilla simple syrup and barley. Tart, with a slight bitterness.

WITH WATER (~46%abv)
The nose gets creamier. More vanilla. Ginger candy. Most of the fruits are gone. Only lemons and overripe peaches remain. The palate becomes softer, but no more complex. Lemons, barley, mild bitterness and woody/papery note. The finish hasn't changed much. Just a little sweeter.

WITH WATER (~40%abv)
The nose feels younger. Wort, salt water taffy, orange peel and vanilla. The palate is tangy and tart. Slightly woody and a little peppery. And that's it. The mellow finish has a melon note and acidic citrus.

WORDS WORDS WORDS
Normally, I don't add much (if any) water to a whisky north of 25 years. But this one's palate would not open up at full strength. A little bit of water didn't do much, and by the time it hit 40%abv it was nearly dead.

This unfortunate because the nose was gorgeous at cask strength. Water didn't kill it, but it didn't improve it either. Had the palate sung like the nose, this would have been a dynamite thing.

The finish was alsio oddly flat and short throughout. These issues have me guessing that there was some lethargic "Oakwood" involved. Great nose, though.

Availability - Scarce
Pricing - one Midwest shop is selling it for $200
Rating - 83

Killing Whisky History, Episode 4 - Teacher's Highland Cream (bottled 1986-1989)

It's here! Episode Four of Killing Whisky History. Two successes: It's the shortest episode yet and I knocked out the first act in a full take.

I'm a big fan of the Teacher's blends — though not the current version so much — I opened one of my dusty bottles for last week's celebration. This will not be my last Teacher's episode because there's more where that came from. Cheers!

The Rum Dummy drinks......Foursquare 11 year old 2004 Barbadian Rum

I like rum. Sweet rum is not for me. Very oaky rum sometimes smells like bourbon. Foursquare is in Barbados. 4chan is everywhere. This one time, my friend did a shot of Bacardi 151 and threw up in my face. Diving for Pearls is paying me in rum to review the rum I drink. This bottle was bought because of hype. That's a bad reason to buy things.

Here's the bottle's label with the bottle's information.

Why put "Exceptional Cask Selection" on the label? What does that mean? If they left it off would they have sold fewer bottles? I won't buy the next bottle that brags about itself. Who am I kidding? Yes, I will.

I drank this Foursquare Rum from St. Philip, Barbados without water, with water, and as a Dark 'n Stormy, a cocktail I don't like. I also don't like adjectives so this review makes me nervous.

Nose - Melting candles, motor oil, vanilla ice cream, burnt dunder. Water wipes the dunder out. Replaces it with bananas, caramel and citronella.
Palate - Bananas and lighter fluid. Olives and sugar. Vanilla, lemon Warheads and cayenne pepper. Water doubles the bananas. More cayenne pepper. Some brine.
Finish - Bananas and lighter fluid. Olives and sugar. Vanilla, lemon Warheads and cayenne pepper. I copy and pasted.

It's not good in a Dark 'n Stormy, a cocktail I don't like. So I ate the lime garnish.

The rum fits in a glass. It smells good. It tastes.

It's big. Smith & Cross Jamaican rum is big too. It costs less money and no one is going to tell you to drink it. Not even me.

This is rum, so I'll drink it.

NOT WHISKY RATING: B-

Randy Brandy drinks.....Delord Bas Armagnac 33 year old 1978

What's all this jilted lover crap? Pearly Coward is outsourcing his brandy reviews now? At least he picked me. I know my 'gnac. Because that's what the cool people call it. 'Gnac. How about I pour a wee dram of 'gnac and have a #TwitterTasting with the #brandyfabric? Assholes.

I do like brandy, though. Here's Krab's birthday bottle:

He told me he bought it for $90 in 2013. But that's probably a lie, because he just wants everyone to feel bad about brandy prices now.

Here are my notes. I don't do sentences. Much.

Color - Rich mahogany
Nose - Good & Plenty (my nickname with the ladies, nudge nudge wink wink, etc.). Madeira, dried cherries, black raisins, orange peel, flowers and grape juice.
Palate - Shoe polish, no, shoe leather, no, shoe polish. Very tangy. Black licorice and black pepper. There's ginger ale, plum and raisins but they're really faint.
Finish - Tangy and sharp. Pepper, prunes, black licorice and shoe polish.

There were my notes.

Wikipedia says the average infant is 73% water. Just like this brandy. But how much of the infant is boisé?

BRANDY JOKE!

Also, this:

Everyone involved should embarrassed.

Look, this armagnac doesn't suck. It's just hidden in water. This reminds me of what Angus the Acceptable recently said about Connoisseurs Choice. It took G&M 40 years of drowning excellent scotch before they bottled it at a "proper" strength. Just because one can bottle an old brandy at 40%abv, doesn't mean one should. This armagnac was probably brittle at full power. Why drown it then? You figure if someone is buying brandy, he's going to want to taste some brandy and not just smell it.

Krab wants me to give it a letter grade. Good. Numbers are a performance.

NOT WHISKY RATING: C+

Jilted Lovers on the Rebound?

Has our lover, Whisky, ditched us for the stupid coked-up rich kids? Then should we not chase prim and proper Cognac? Or maybe Armagnac, the Frenchie who doesn't shave? How about Rum, the one with the piercings and a more exotic background than our former lover?

Did Whisky free us to explore other relationships, knowing full well we'll always come back because no matter how exciting these new experiences are, nothing compares 2 U, Whisky?

I enjoy brandy. I've liked Calvados for a long time. But having once spent over $40 for a bottle of it, I shan't do that again. And though I've had some good armagnacs, I prefer cognac. With few exceptions, long-aged armagnac reads (to me) like "Wow, this is almost as good as single malt scotch!" Actually, unaged brandies from around the world appeal to me more than most brown brandies.

Same thing with rum. A good clear rum spirit registers so much brighter and enjoyable than its aged siblings. That's not to say I don't like brown rums. I've had a number of very good ones (Hampden and Caroni!). But the new pricing of decent rum makes me think, "I can just buy whisky."

Some whisky bloggers publicly shit on gin. Not I. Gin is cool, in general. There's another unaged spirit I adore even more, and I've hinted about it plenty during this blog's life.

I waste your time with this subject matter right now because I've been playing tourist at some aged-spirits social media groups. Some of these groups spawned like Athena, violently and fully formed. Others existed long before my fellow Whisky Rejected joined up. Though I like (and occasionally love) the booze they discuss, I feel no interest in engaging or arguing about the nerdy stuff. I've also noticed the gradual creep of Here's More Shit I Just Bought And Must Show The World posts beloved by the whisk(e)y world.

To get back to the starting metaphor...... As your pal from the Whisky Relationship era of your life, I must ask about your new partners:

"Are you happy?"

"Is this progress?"

"Yeah, I know whisky is a trollop (you can thank his/her parents for that), but did you really have to dip your wick that quick just because everyone else was?"

"Whisky is never coming back. It's not your fault. Actually, it is your fault, but that's another story. I forgot, what was I going to ask you?"

---

This subject came to mind on Thursday as I was pouring a few birthday beverages. I was enjoying a blended whisky, a highly hyped rum and an old armagnac. And I liked the whisky blend the best. It was thicker, more complex and (most importantly!) a better drinking experience than the other two spirits. (Here's my old review of the stuff, I'm sticking to it after three years.)

Before opening the armagnac, I knew there could be some issues with it, but I was prepared to engage fully with it even if problems arose. The rum was monolithic, but good. Yet it made me think of a cheaper rum that's of at least equal quality.

I realized this moderate cognitive dissonance wasn't because Whisky is inherently better than Brandy or Rum. And my three drinks were not perfect examples of their genres, as if there could be a good single stand-in for any of these three broad categories.

But still, I can't bring myself to review the rum and brandy. So I have decided to bring in two guest reviewers to report on their experiences with these spirits, this week. Stay tuned...