...where distraction is the main attraction.

Friday, May 11, 2012

Lube This


NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO--

*catches breath*

NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO--

*catches breath*

NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO--

*catches breath*

This is a violation of whiskey. And of d*ck.

Does someone out there really want their parts to taste like Jack Daniels? Or on the other side of things, why does someone want to taste that down there? And how is it possible that one's area tastes worse than Old Number 7?  Old Number 2 is more like it--

NO NO NO NO NO NO WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO PLEASE GO TO A DOCTOR NO NO NO NO NO NO--

*catches breath*

NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO--

--maybe if it was Macallan Fine Oak (GET IT?!) then there could be a reasonable--

NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO.

I'm just bitter that someone thought of this before me.

(Many thanks to Johnnie Mundell Depp.)