Let FWP Die, also a 1989 Bowmore review

photo source

Though I am among those who have used the term "French Whore Perfume" to describe the characteristics of 1980s Bowmore, I would like to entreat everyone to bury the term altogether.

Aside from it having become lazy shorthand utilized by no one who has met une prostituée française, the term leaves every Gallic streetwalker pondering, "Why am I getting stigmatized? The real problematic odor is French John Sweaty Ass (aka FJSA)." I mean, we poets haven't labelled the Bowmore problem Violets, Soap And Failure, have we? No, we're saying the whisky smells like something a female sex worker wears to cover up the scent of previous customers so that she can be sexually alluring for the next man. Yet we're using a word that has long been separated from its denotation, and now has merged with its connotation, just like "slut".

Sure, worse words can be used to directly link whisky with women (and sexuality). But FWP goes there. And I'm publicly prodding this problem because I hope this boy's club of a Scotch community will think about this, if just for a sober moment, even as we're served by an industry that still struggles with the idea of gender equality amongst its potential customer base. You don't need to be woke to know that the words "French Whore Perfume" will age even worse than "The Jane Walker Special Edition".

I am happy to see FWP referenced less frequently than before, but we can thank the scarcity of those infamous Bowmores for that. So, my dudes, let us allow FWP to go the way of that crummy chapter of Bowmore's history. Let's let FWP die.

---

And now, a 1980s Bowmore.

Thank you to My Annoying Opinions (hey, he's not the only one with annoying opinions, you know) for the sample. I have no idea when we did this sample swap.

Distillery: Bowmore

Independent Bottler: The Whisky Agency
Series: Liquid Sun
Region: Islay, Scotland

Age: 22 years (1989 - 2011)

Maturation: bourbon hogshead
Bottle count: 256

Alcohol by Volume: 50.7%
Chillfiltered? No
Colored? No

NEAT
No Violets, Soap and Failure on this nose. It's a tree root ball, dense roots and soil wrapped up in burlap. Charred honeydew. Iodine and chalk. Lemonade powder. Clementines. A smoky nut brittle. The palate a light peat, almost mesquite (sorry for the rhyme). Burnt, mineral, with a perky zing. A tangy green note that I want to say is cactus, but probably isn't. A bit of agave nectar, but also añejo tequila. The charred melon comes back to the finish. A brisk bitterness meets soft peat smoke. Agave nectar and limey citrus.

DILUTED TO ~40%abv
The nose gets fruitier, like peaches and melons. Milder smoke. Wet ashes, wet sand. The palate is still very sharp, almost (here it comes) austere. Mineral, tart, salty, bitter. Chile peppers and a hint of smoke. Tangy citrus and chile peppers in the finish. Mild sweetness and smoke.

WORDS WORDS WORDS
As if I haven't written enough words today.

This whisky noses and drinks very well at its modest full strength. The peat never dominates, nor does the fruit or minerals. That balance holds, and maybe even improves, with air. Nothing about it is a knockout, but it is very good multitasking whisky, especially when snow falls in April.

Availability - Probably sold out a half decade ago
Pricing - I think it sold for just a little bit over €100 back in the day
Rating - 87

An April of Indie Bowmore

*NOT AN APRIL FOOLS DAY JOKE* probably

Ever since I bought my first independently bottled Bowmore, I've been telling everyone who will listen to me to ditch the official releases for the indies. While I do enjoy the official Tempests and the standard 18yo, there's something different in style about the indie Bowmores. They're usually leaner and meaner, while also being more balanced than most of the OBs. Sometimes they're surprisingly fruity, other times they're intensely peaty.

Perhaps the difference is due to the full strength, uncolored and unfiltered treatment the independent bottlers provide. Or it's just the nature of a single cask versus a massive batch. Still there's usually such a gap in style between the IBs and OBs that they seem to come from two different distilleries.

I also have MANY Bowmore samples sitting my stash, so it's time to put a dent in it. And maybe I'll find out if there's a consistency to the quality or style. And maybe I'll find out I'm full of crap. (PROBABLE SPOILER: I always find out I'm full of crap.)

In January, I positively(!) assaulted all four of my readers with Ben Nevis reviews. This time, I won't bludgeon you with Bowmore. While there will still be plenty of indie Bowmore reviews, I will post something not-Bowmore every Friday.

And, AND!, I will open up and review one of my own bottles of IB Bowmore to close out the month. Exciting, right?

Right?

Great!

Glenmorangie Tùsail

This is only Glenmorangie special release I've ever been interested in. With Tùsail, Dr. Bill stops playing with his wood long enough to fiddle with the barley.

Because every company (not just LVMH) floods the whisky market with wood and wine experiments, I'm particularly fond of releases that showcase barley strains. Bruichladdich, Benromach, Springbank, Arran and (yes) Glenlivet have tried it out. It's a fun thing, and since the hipsters and geeks and nerds are spenders, maybe more producers should give it a try. I'm just saying.

For Tùsail, the Glenmo team distilled floor-malted Maris Otter Winter Barley for the spirit. Maris Otter was originally designed/bred in the mid-1960s for England's brewing industry. Over the next ten to twenty years, the strain became less popular because other types produced a higher sugar/alcohol yield. According to Glenmorangie's site, two merchants chose to protect and harvest Maris Otter starting in 1992.

Bruichladdich and Glann ar Mor (in France) have since made Maris Otter malts. Glenmorangie gave it a stab in 2014.

Distillery: Glenmorangie
Ownership: Louis Vuitton Moet-Hennessy (àccênts and ümlåūts not included)
Region: Highlands (Northern)
Age: NAS, though a former blogger claimed it was 10 years old
Maturation: ex-bourbon casks
Alcohol by Volume: 46%
Chill-filtered? ???
Colorant added? ???

The nose leads with toasty barley and roasted nuts. Irish soda bread, baby powder and almond cookies. Plantains and fermenting apples. Hints of fudge and cookie dough? A prickle of spirity heat.

The palate has the roasty/toasty notes from the nose, but also an expressive dried herbality (herbalness? herbalism?). Think oregano, fennel seed and anise wrapped in a soft bitterness. It's malty and tangy with minimal vanilla. Lemons, bananas and almond cookies.

The long finish is light on sweetness and vanilla. Heavier on fennel seed and peppercorns. Heaviest on malt.

This was as enjoyable as the 18 year old, but for very different reasons. While the 18 showcases finesse and cask blended, Tùsail on a bright spirit that's bolder and feistier than anything else by Glenmorangie. Yeah, there was the old Astar, but that zipped around at 57%abv while this one punches in at 46%.

Tùsail is neither too young nor raw, though I'd be giddier to try it at 18 years if it could find balance with the oak at that age. It still comes across as an experiment at this time, BUT it may be an experiment I'd purchase if I could nab it for less than $100.

Availability - Like most of Glenmorangie's limited editions, it's still widely available 3+ years after its release.
Pricing - $90-$120 US, $100-$150 Europe (ex-VAT)
Rating - 86

Glenmorangie 15 year old (bottled in 2005)

A certain portion of the whisky-buying populace takes an abundance of photos of purchased whisky bottles, then peppers social media platforms with evidence of conspicuous consumption.

I have the opposite problem. Often, I take no photos of a purchased bottle. When I finish the whisky and dispose of its vessel I then have NO PICTURES for the damned review blog posts. Like today's.

---

One afternoon, 5 years ago, I came upon a corner liquor store in Los Angeles Proper with at least three bottles of the now defunct Glenmorangie 15 for its original price. I've always tried not to be the sort of asshole who cleans out a dusty find, so I bought one bottle.

The 15 year old (without a silly name) was retired in 2007 when Glenmorangie's owners, LVMH, chose to revamp the current range and sexify the remaining expressions. Now, before we go all "Ahhh, how Glenmorangie used to be!", remember the 15 spent an unspecified amount of time being finished in "NEW OAK" (all caps courtesy of the bottle's tube). So yes, Mr. Bill was going Full Carpenter at an early age.

Anyway, I found this to be a fair whisky when I drank it leisurely. Let's see how it reviews...

Distillery: Glenmorangie
Ownership: Louis Vuitton Moet-Hennessy (accents and umlauts still not included)
Region: Highlands (Northern)
Age: at least 15 years
Maturation: ex-bourbon casks then a "NEW OAK" finish
Bottling date: 2005 (code: L5 023)
Alcohol by Volume: 43%
Chill-filtered? ???
Colorant added? ???

Its nose is light and pretty. Roses, lychees and peaches. Hibiscus tea. Pencil shavings and envelope glue. There's also musty dunnage whiff here and there. It picks up much more vanilla with time, as well as a slight cherry candy note.

The palate begins with the nose's gentle fruitiness. And that moment of funky cask. But back to the fruits: acidic citrus and peach candy. It all gets tarter with time. Meanwhile, there are also hints of pepper, grass and cardboard. Moderate sweetness and a touch of woody bitterness.

The warm finish has flowers and tart apples. More tangy than bitter. Black pepper and a wee bit of wort.

I liked this better when I was consuming it casually. Once the inspection began, it didn't hold up as well, especially next to the 18 year old. While it shares the 18's gentleness and fruits, the 15's wood speaks much louder here than the elder's sherry casks.

Taking the current Scotch scene into consideration, this whisky would probably be an utter sawdust and vanilla bomb if produced in 2018, so I'm not that sad this expression was retired. Still, it's fun and it provides a different whisky experience than the 10 and 18. And perhaps it's more of a drinker than a thinker.

Availability - Happy hunting!
Pricing - dunno, but I bought mine for $65 five years ago
Rating - 83

Glenmorangie 18 year old "Extremely Rare" (current bottling)

As I write this the fourth day of spring comes to a close, yet this grim winter refuses to piss off. But I'm going to pretend the sun is warming the ground, leaves are beginning to peek through the branches and my HVAC system is getting a rest. And I'm going to review three whiskies from Glenmorangie, a distillery that produces a light fruity malt that suits warm weather.

I've devoted too many posts decrying the utter silliness of LVMH distilleries' (Ardbeg and Glenmorangie) limited releases. So this time I've chosen three 'Morangie malts that (I hope) are some of the more thoughtful Lumsden productions.

---

To begin the week, I am reviewing the current official 18 year old. It's officially called "Extremely Rare" because it is available at every specialty liquor retailer in the world. But aside from the name, there's a minimum of goofiness going on in this single malt.

Its contents are pretty straightforward. 70% of the whisky spent all 18 years in American oak, while the other 30% spent 15 years in American oak and 3 years in "Spanish Oloroso" casks. I'm pretty sure "Spanish Oloroso" is redundant, but it may be a way to distract from the likelihood that the Oloroso-seasoned casks were also made out of American oak. I really cannot make it through a single paragraph without this cynical flatulence, can I?

Yes, I can. See.

Distillery: Glenmorangie
Ownership: Louis Vuitton Moet-Hennessy (accents and umlauts still not included)
Region: Highlands (Northern)
Age: at least 18 years
Maturation: see above
Alcohol by Volume: 43%
Chill-filtered? ???
Colorant added? ???
(Thank you to Monsieur Brett for the sample!)

Hmmmm, a happy >1 ratio of spirit to wood in the nose. Dried apricots, peach candy and a little bit of lawn. Very moderate vanilla. The subtle sherry element is MUCH better integrated than Lasanta. In fact it's a mild nutty thing that weaves amongst the rest of the characteristics. The nose improves with time, picking up more lemon, apple, honey and grapefruit.

The palate starts off with tangy citrus and tart stone fruit. The sherry wood is toasty, as opposed to grapey. A peppery oomph makes the whole thing a little brisker than expected. Apples, pears, a whiff of flowers. Its citrus side expands with time.

Its finish has a tart, but not acidic, bite. White fruits and almonds. Limes and grapefruits.

Gotta say, this is tremendously pleasant. And well made, especially compared to almost everything else by Glenmo. It also fits in with the other two Big Glens, Fiddich and Livet, whose 18 year olds are (or at least were as of three years ago) the best part of their regular ranges. If you don't go into this whisky expecting bags of complexity, you may just find it terribly nice.

Availability - Nearly every specialty Scotch retailer in the known world
Pricing - $85 - $125
Rating - 86

MAO Mix: Tomatin Cuatro flavour

MAO mao mao mao
MAO mao mao mao
MAO mao mao Mao
MAO Mao mao mao
MAO mao mao mao
MAO mao mao mao
MAO mao mao Mao
MAO Mao mao mao

I'm going to get so many clicks now! That's how SEO works, right?

---

Upon opening a parcel recently sent to me by Comrade My Annoying Opinions, I found this:

Oh, and also this:

For those who've drifted on to more pleasant non-whisky pastures (such as brandy, rum, politics, carving out your eyeballs with a teaspoon, etc.) since 2014, Tomatin distillery simultaneously released four (cuatro!) 12 year old single malts, with each having spent nine years in ex-bourbon casks and 3 years in a specific type of sherry cask. Fino, Manzanilla, Oloroso and Smuckers Pedro X each received its own release.

MAO took a hit for the team and bought all four. He reviewed them. Then he mixed them. And reviewed his mix (see Blend A). Now I will review his mix.

MAO Mix: Tomatin Cuarto flavour - 46% abv
1:1:1:1 (Fino : Manzanilla : Oloroso : Pedro Ximenez cask releases)

At first the sherry is quite reserved in the nose, letting the malt stand out. There's also hint of something smoky and industrial. The sherry element grows with time, showing up as both nutty and (berry) jammy. Fresh pears and white peaches. Those fruits pick up a funky fermenting note after the whisky sits in the glass for 30 minutes.

Some moderate fruity sherry in the palate, which is more sherried than the nose. Tart fruits and raisins. A hint of woody bitterness that gradually turns into an almost eucalyptus-like zing. There's a dark, almost tarry, note underneath.

On the finish it's raisins and star anise, then hints of bitterness and sweetness. A solid salty note. A good length.

I'd choose this 12 year old Tomatin mix over the official Macallan 12. Of course, that's not as hot of a take as it would have been five years ago. But let that not be a strike against this MAO Mix, which is a well-balanced combo with good fruit stuff that reins in the excitable oak. It's a good winter drink, someone should bottle it.

Rating - 元元元习 (3 yuan and 1 Xí)

Mission: Mars concludes

Here are the Mission: Mars whiskies I reviewed:

--Shinshu 12 year old 1986, cask 452 - 43%abv - Rating: 90

--Shinshu 12 year old 1992, cask 1125  - 43%abv - Rating: 88

--Shinshu 20 year old 1989, cask 618 - 58%abv - Rating: 82

--Shinshu Komagatake Nature of Shinshu - Kohiganzakura - 52%abv - Rating: 83

--Shinshu Komagatake 2012 "Super Heavy Peated", cask 1492 - 58%abv - Rating: 80

--Shinshu Mars 3 year old 2013 Blackadder, cask 1647 - 61%abv - Rating: 78

--Shinshu Mars 3 year old 2013 Tsunuki Aging, cask 5108 - 58%abv - Rating: 81

--Tsunuki New Pot Heavily Peated new make - 60%abv - Rating: 63

Before

What Was versus What Is

At first glance, it appears as if the scores are saying, "The stuff from back in the day was better." But that's not necessarily true. The current era of Mars whiskies are barely legal, while the malts I tried from the previous era had much longer maturation periods (and were unpeated). Also, that 20 year old single cask was overoaked and uninspiring.

The last four whiskies were substantially peated, so the era was different, the maturation periods were different and the spirits themselves were different. That being said, I am not motivated to try any current Shinshu/Tsunuki whisky until it gets 8+ years on it. It's nearly impossible to produce an excellent 3 year old whisky, but Mars does get respect points for not oak-doping these whisky toddlers. But will any of us be able to afford 8 year old Shinshu, because...

These whiskies are crazy expensive

My conservative estimate for the price of the first seven bottles is $3000. Yes, some of that pricing is due to the secondary market. But if you think Mars is going to sell their upcoming single casks for less than what they know they can get, then I want to give you a smooch because you're adorbs.

Perhaps the "Nature of Shinshu" series provides a good estimate of Mars's current pricing plans. Those whiskies range from $150-$200 or so, and they're almost entirely 3-5 year old stuff. Though the company claims there's some 25+ year old malt in the mix, I doubt it's more than a sprinkle. Unless those old casks fell below 40%abv, they're tremendously valuable. Do you know what 25-30yo cask strength Japanese single malt is worth? If you don't, that's okay because it barely exists in the present market. Those would be multi-thousand-dollar bottles.

Speaking of cask strength

My favorite whiskies of the bunch were bottled at 43%abv. My least favorite whiskies were 60+%abv. Part of that probably has to do with my current palate. But, again, I'm comparing Satsuma plums to Satsuma oranges here.

By the way, Satsuma oranges aren't actually from Satsuma. They're from Zhejiang, China. They acquired their name because the fruits were originally exported to America through Satsuma. A Satsuma (or unshiu) variety is now grown in Gulf states, like Louisiana and Florida. Now you know, and knowing is half the battle.

After

Is there hope?

Probably not.

Oh, you mean for the current era of Mars whiskies? Maybe. The "Nature of Shinshu" Kohiganzakura was decent, and the Komagatake Sherry & American White Oak was very good. By producing four kinds of malts at each of their distilleries, Hombo Spirits is bound to find at least one or two successful combos. I just hope they give their casks some time. And then underprice Chichibu. Please.